Cary Schmidt’s Book Lasting Impact (Lots of great material...several things are direct quotes here along with a lot of fodder)
2. Parents Show Love by Disciplining Their Children.
Proverbs 19:18 states, “Chasten thy son while there is hope, and let not thy soul spare for his crying.”
Discipline is the process of bringing my child's behavior into obedience to the Heavenly Father-teaching my child to live in submission to the authority of God and His Word.
It is not merely controlling or modifying my child's behavior.
It is not just punishment for doing wrong.
It is not limiting the embarrassment that my child causes me in public.
Authentic, biblical discipline is chastening, which involves nurture and training.
It's is always developmental and motivated by selfless love.
Effective discipline should always be restorative rather than punitive.
In other words, it's motivated by a desire to restore the heart not merely punish it.
Effective discipline should always flow from an obedient, humble heart-not an angry frustrated one. In other words, I discipline my children because God commands me to, not because they anger me.
Finally, effective discipline should include prayer and Scripture.
The end of a discipline moment should include affection, expressions of love, and a transparent moment before the Lord in prayer together.
Probably the biggest mistake parents make today regarding discipline is that they are too tired to deal with it. Real, biblical discipline takes energy, time, and training. It's easier to send them to their room, ground them, and forget about it. Effective parents don't operate this way.
When we are too tired to engage in biblical discipline, we are saying “Go ahead and destroy yourself… I don't care.”
2. Parents Show Love by Discipling Their Children.
Deuteronomy 6:7 “And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.”
This passage speaks to parents of teaching and training our children in the ways of the Lord.
God's command is that our relationship should be one of constant discipleship-constantly explaining and making sense of God's laws and the principles of Scripture.
It's easy to miss teaching opportunities.
Discipleship requires time and intentional training.
If you wonder what to teach your kids, I challenge you to do a few things.
First, read good parenting books. These books will fill your heart with subjects and principles to transfer.
Second, consider what you struggled with at their ages-the things you wish someone had talked to you about-and then go for it.
Finally, consider where they are in life and what's coming next, and prepare them. Look at the road ahead for the next couple of years and help them know what's around the next bend.
Give them biblical principles that will help them know how to think and how to respond.
Loving parents always disciple their children.
3. Parents Show Love by Developing Their Children.
Ephesians 6:4 teaches, “And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath: but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.”
The command is to “bring them up”-to nourish them to maturity. Yes, this includes discipling them spiritually, but it also includes developing them practically. The state of the family today lends to neglect, which lends to teenagers merely vegetating their way through life-playing video games, skateboarding, facebooking, and generally just hanging out.
Developing our children requires discernment of their gifts, interests, and abilities.